Saturday, October 5, 2013

Finding Time

every morning I wake up
with the list of thing needing done
racing through my head

every night the list
longer than ever

sometimes bills are paid late
phone calls not returned
litter boxes can wait until tomorrow
Mom needs flannel pajama pants...
a long handled scrubbie for bathing
she needs a haircut
for the foot doctor to make a house call
she needs more attention
some fun

but I need to call and have the furnaces checked
arrange a day for the bird feeder installation
reschedule bathroom remodel
buy some Command strip hangers for her tools
check on her prescriptions...any need filled soon
cook meals
grocery shop

visit Dad every morning
wash his clothes and fleece blankets

change the liner in the bedside commode daily
scrub twice a week

find some elastic shoelaces for Mom
call doctor about ordering her Dexa scan...flu shot

then there are the things that bother her
clutter in the sewing room
( still a mess from when I moved in)
piles of papers on my part of the kitchen table...
she straightened them the other day
still can't find a few important papers

in between all that she gets medicine
three times a day before I go to work
plus two types of breathing treatment
before I leave I make sure she was water and eye drops
on the stand next to the bed
she has a phone there
but has forgotten how to answer it

please know I'm not complaining...just saying
if you're not the caregiver you have no idea

finding time for me
when I'm awake to enjoy it
might just be impossible
unless I start hand quilting all my little quilts
mindless stitching without
making too much of a mess


this week Mom has been:

washing dishes
doing laundry
making her bed
making coffee and tea
as well as soup and a sandwich
telling me she can " do it " herself
talking to the cats about how good they are

Dad had a rough week
with a UTI, dehydration and high Coumadin levels
plus the wound is back on his foot

All in all
I am tired...not exhausted
no resorting to Red Bull yet...

I have so many cat pics to share
once I find out how to get them from
phone to computer....


Jacque. said...

oh Kelley Girl...I know you're not complaining...that you are, indeed, just saying. Love you for what you're doing. I pray for you...that you have strength to carry on. xo

Mary A said...

My thoughts are with you and know that you are not alone in this caregiving business. I am caring for my father who will turn 90 next week and is demented. My F-I-L also has dementia and I am trying to help my husband deal with this. I know what you are going through and there are many of us going with it. Hugs, Mary A

WoolenSails said...

Ok, now i am tired from hearing all you do, lol.
I don't know how you do it without collapsing and i hope you make time to rest and enjoy a few hours for yourself, before you do.


quiltsbycheri said...

you may be just tired but I'm plum worn out from reading all you do every, every day......doubt my eyes would be able to stay open to find a few moments of stitching......oh my!

Kim said...

It's not complaining. It's your reality right now. I understand. Sometimes finding 20 minutes uninterrupted is hard. And you are suddenly keeping track of everyone's schedules and issues. Friday I happened to be at the pharmacy and figured while I was there I would pick up moms refills. The pharmacist said it was a week early and wouldn't give them to me. I politely advised her to remember this moment if she ever became a caregiver and how someday she might NEED to do things when they are convenient.

The Evening Stitcher said...

Oh Kelley....My heart aches for you, your mom, and your dad. Take comfort in knowing that you are doing a wonderful, wonderful thing for your parents and you will be rewarded. God Bless......

Ter'e said...

Ah Kell:
You are one person. One woman. (Where in the hell is your sister?)

Take a deep breath. Lists will get you thru. Try to stay organized. Don't lose your precious self in the process.

I wish you had someone that should share the responsibilities. How I wish I was closer. You must acknowledge what a fantastic job you are doing. Tell yourself!!!! Pass the praise onto yourself that we give you.

You are a terrific daughter. Your love of your parents is precious. Hang in there, honey.

Maria said...

Kelley, hang in there! What a wonderful daughter you are to provide such wonderful unselfish care to your parents. And it is refreshing and realistic to hear someone tell it like it is. Maria

Pam in IL said...

I'm in the same boat with you and totally understand. Everyone tells me to take care of myself too.

Keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers.

Alice ~ Folk Art Primitives said...

Ditto all of the above compliments! You're a wonder!!

Greta said...

It is a very good thing you do. Please know there are many of us out here who understand the tired you are describing; the statements that you are making; and the love you have for your parents. I understand too well because I care for my daughter who has ignored every gloomy prediction the doctors have made for 33 years.

Every day, every hour, and sometimes every minute can be a refreshing new start if necessary. I offer only one piece of advice - make sure you take care of you too so that you will be able to continue to take such wonderful care of your parents. E-hugs and prayers are with you!

Cotton Eyed Jo said...

There nothing I need to add, but one day when all of this is past not present, you'll treasure memories you've chronicled on your blog.

For now the lists will help you do the things you need to complete. So keep on making them, but put at least one reward for Kelley on every days list, be it a hot bath/shower, a few minutes to nap, or perhaps a celery stick! Yuck! Lol

Heritage Hall said...

Kelley dear ~ Don't ever deny yourself the attention you need in
this energy-draining process. Honor yourself with needed quiet time and restorative pauses. Bless
your heart for the love and care you are giving your will never look back with regret or
head held low, for this is the time
of your greatest gift to them. May
He hold you in the embrace of His
healing mercies throughout.