Sunday, March 9, 2014

Here's the Deal

image found on Pinterst
 
the depression is crushing
or maybe it's guilt, stress, burnout, anxiety
 
whatever
 
I have lost even the ability to pretend
to be okay
nothing is fun
I look forward to nothing but sleep
at any minute of the day
 
 
 
I know I have to back off
with Mom and regain
some of my own life again
 
I am talking with someone
trying to get help
what you know in your head
doesn't always make it to the rest of your body
 
 
 


19 comments:

Jacque. said...

oh dear, Kelley Girl. I am so sorry that you are having such a rough time. Yes, you do need time for yourself, else you're no good to anyone else (your Mom). Hang in there and talk, talk, talk. My prayers for your continue. xo

From Sherry's Heart said...

I know and understand exactly what you mean and feel it too. I'm sorry,wouldn't wish it on anybody.

Susan said...

May you find peace and hope for the future.

Orange Sink said...

OH KELLEY!!
Know that I am sending thoughts, prayers, wishes and hugs for you to heal quickly. I am so glad you are talking with someone. There are better days ahead!
Healing hugs!!!!
Cathy G

annie said...

prayed for you in church this morning, and last night! sorry it's such a struggle right now. rest as you are able, and don't you dare feel like you are selfish or guilty. you do need some time just for you, and it's okay for you to seek some help. you are a good girl, and are doing your best, no one could expect more of you than that. hugs.

Dirty Martini Queen said...

Oh sweet Kelley, you are not alone with your battle and jut keep seeking help. You have been an amazing daughter and caretaker so don't feel bad that now you feel untethered.
Donna

marly said...

I'm sorry Kelley. After all the responsibilty, obligations, care, and support, it is taken from us, and we are left feeling empty and useless. Top that off with feelings of unwarranted guilt, and support is needed. I hope the help you receive is from others that have experienced caregiving. Best wishes to you. It will get better.

~Backroad Treasures~ said...

Such a sad thing we endure in life, please be assured that we all are here to listen and prayer for you to find yourself again.....
Hugs
Rhonda

WoolenSails said...

I hope you can find a balance between helping your mom and taking care of yourself, it has been a hard year for you and you do need time to step back and give yourself a break before you tackle any more.

Debbie

quiltsbycheri said...

Kelley so glad you are taking the important step of finding someone to talk and help you sort out all of this stuff, stuff, stuff.....you definitely need to not lose yourself but find the right balance that works for all......let go of the quilt!!!
you have been a helpful and caring daughter and your mom, if she was aware would tell you emphatically take care of you too!
xoxoxo

Rugs and Pugs said...

Kelley,
I'm glad you are starting to take of yourself. You have been through so much. A person can only do so much and you have done more.
Hugs :)
Lauren

Lori from Notforgotten Farm said...

what you are going through is completely normal.
Everything you are feeling has been felt by a child/parent caregiver…it doesn't make you a bad person to think the things that creep into your head ~ it means you are a human being.
Please know that you're not alone and that we are all here for you ~
need to talk, or anything else….always.
xoxo
L

jennifer768 said...

So very sorry that things are so hard for you right now.May you find healing and peace in your life soon.Prayers and hugs,Jen

Lee Morrison said...

Dearest Kelley,

You have taken the most important step...you are getting help. You have to take care yourself so that you can continue to be the amazing daughter that you are to your Mom. It is a hard road, but you are stronger than you know. You are in my prayers.

God bless....

Lee

Pam in IL said...

Kelley, you are in my thoughts and prayers. I hope that the one you are talking to will provide you with the support you need.

HomeSpunPrims said...

Oh Kelley, I'm so sorry. I'm glad you are talking to someone. My prayers will continue for you and your mom. I hope you can find the balance in your life to find joy again. Remember all things are possible thru the Lord. I pray better days are ahead for you my friend. Much love, Lori

ihook2 said...

Oh Kelley, You are in my prayers. I'm so sorry you are feeling this way. I'm glad you are getting some help to sort this all out. You are such a kind, sweet, loving daughter and person. We are all here for you anytime. I will continue to pray daily for you and your mom. God loves you and so do we.
Love-
Pam

Maria said...

Kelley, bless your precious and kind heart. Your parents raised a wonderful person and you have given so much to both of them. Remember through these tough times, that your mom loves you and would want only the best for you. My prayers are with you to stay strong and keep talking and expressing your feelings, Maria

suz said...

rest assured, Kelley, that you will come out of this okay. Taking care of our parents is a very difficult thing to do. I went through this with both of my parents - my mother was the hardest - but after all was said and done, if I had to do it again, I would. I have no regrets now. You are very wise to stop and take some time for yourself. We forget to do that sometimes. It will be better for you and for your Mom. Sending you prayers.